Saturday, July 24, 2010


I'm going to be real for a moment....

I'm having a hard time showing compassion to wife who's husband is in basic training/ Tech school.  She is CONESTENTLY complaining about not being able to talk to her husband.  It's taking all.i.have. not to scream at her  "He can't call you.  GROW UP!" You'll be ok, you know where he's at, he's at a base, he's got food three times a day, he even has a fucking bed!"  Grow some thick skin sister, you're going to need it or you'll never survive the next 20 years (they claim they will be lifers), or heck, even the next four.....

Like I said.  It's taking all I have.... 

Probably not the best thing, being a Recruiter's wife and all...

I don't know why I'm letting it erk me so bad, but man she has gotten under my skin. 

Please tell me I'm not the only one who get's sick about 'new wives bitching'... please...


  1. You're not the only one. I was the same way while my hubby was an EA recruiter. Maybe we're jaded though since the hubby has been in forever. ;-)

  2. I have definitely struggled with the same thing at times. But I try to keep in mind that everyone's perspective is different and for someone who hasn't been through a deployment, going through school seems hard. But keep in mind, trying is the operative word. I don't always succeed in keeping that mindset.

  3. new wives humor me. I know i sound like a bitchy old wife, but now that he's at 13 years that's pretty much what I am. I chalk it up to getting their sea legs, they just have to find their routine.

  4. Hi, I'm a new follower.

    No, you're definitely not the only one who feels frustrated by this. It's almost in the same category as those civilian wives that complain about husbands being away on business for a few weeks. I guess they're lucky they haven't experienced a deployment to realize that there are worse things in life.

  5. I think Jessica said it best. New military wives haven't gone through a deployment yet to to have anything to compare it to.

    I'm a fairly new wife (both in general and to the military). Honestly, basic training was harder to me than the deployment we are going through now. For us, when he was a civilian, we were always together. Going from that, to never talking to him was hard. I knew he was safe, but I had become dependent on him and didn't know how to be my own person without him. I was a huge mess and I'm sure the one other military wife I knew probably felt the same way you do. She even bluntly put it in my face one day that it wasn't that bad. Looking back, it wasn't. But, also, I hadn't learned and experienced what it was like to be a military wife.

    Try to be patient with new wives. They have a lot to learn.

  6. I know what you mean. It's hard to feel sympathetic when someone is so whiny about the whole process. I understand that it can be hard when you are first getting use to things, but at some point you've got to realize that whining, crying, and writing about the struggles of being a military wife can seem trite to those of us who have gone through years without our husbands. It's hard not to compare experiences. . . anyway, I try to suck it up and still be supportive regardless, but sometimes it grates on your nerves! You are only human!

  7. Hi,

    I really like your blog. I am a casting director for a docu-reality series sponsored by the USO about military families awaiting the return of a loved one stationed overseas. This series is about how the family prepares for their service member's return and highlights the bravery, sacrifice, and courage military families need to have. I would love if you submitted to be part of the series. You can find an online submission form at or email me directly at for more information.

    Thank you so much,

  8. I think you are FANTASTIC. My husband is now retired from the Army of 20 years and still to this day, I can not stand these women that can't handle it. Guess what - it only gets worse. Get ready for the many years of deployments, wars, TDY's, rumors, etc. If you think basic is bad, you have another thing coming. Good luck to all the newbee's and the strong spouses of the Military - normal civilian's do not understand what you are going through and what you have been through. Keep up the posts, they are great!

    From One Military Wife to Another - stand by your man...TS